She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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