How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
