stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
