If that was your dad, he is hot
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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