dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
