Nicole vs. Life
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Sorry my hands just texted you
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
