for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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