He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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