Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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