Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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