Nicole vs. Life
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
