Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
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I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
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I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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