i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
