Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
