I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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