brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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