i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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