Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
