Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize