I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize