ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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