i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
FUCK WHALES
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize