put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
