remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
