I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
