I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize