She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Randomize
