Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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