So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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