this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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