Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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