i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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