Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He passed out mid-signature
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
