Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
