Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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