i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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