Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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