it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
