Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
love makes seman taste better
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize