I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
