Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
