FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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