i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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