Your tits are I can't wait for
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
