Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
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I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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