you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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