who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
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