I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
