And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
