Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
