doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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